Mirth and Melancholy

Well well well. I'm back, it's 6 PM, and I'm supposed to be doing my homework. But I still have some stories to tell. I have a thought on mind right now. It's so difficult to accept yourself for who you are and ignore others who seem better off than you. Here's a situation to put the thought into perspective. You're a shy, quiet person all alone in a setting where other people are around, talking to each other. They're not alone. They have friends. Their bond is making them seem better than you because they're both likable enough people to befriend each other. And it doesn't make you feel very good about yourself. In another case, there's a trio of 3 friends. And you're the one friend who always seems to be the underdog, or the runt of the litter. The two others are always ganging up on you. Everything you say is wrong. Outsiders agree with the other two. And you keep telling yourself the cliche assurance that "it may seem like t...

It's been quite a busy time for me. I don't even really know what exactly to say. I suppose I'll set free the thoughts that flow through my mind and into my fingers which type them. Mmmm... let's start with a rant I had in mind recently. Specifically, last night. Some girls say so passionately that they "hate" the color pink, their reasoning solely being that it pertains to anything and everything "girly." And I view this statement two ways, one being I take it seriously as a fact, and two being with a grain of salt. To put it more simply, when I hear people say they don't like the color pink, I believe them. We can possess a disliking to a certain color for no reason at all. That's okay. On the other hand, I take this statement skeptically. I attribute the passionate feelings to how pink is and has always been associated with females. I feel that a liking for pink can exist within the "haters" but they just refuse to admi...

...there's no point in looking elsewhere. -  Maryrose Wood My teacher is still a B. I figured out (WITHOUT HER HELP) why my website wasn't showing up on the server. It's because she didn't tell us to upload the REST of our web page files to the server too. So my website's finally on there in all its beauty (check it out here if you like:   http://patti-bee.dcccd.edu/imed1416/fahzy/ ). /)o-o/) (\o-o(\ (\o-o/) I got a 100 for project D, which was implementing CSS into my website. It was challenging at first and I didn't feel like reading through allll the lecture notes. So I watched videos on the material instead. (basically teaching myself the material like always .-.) I'm lost so let me list what I need to talk about in this post. - Monday {fire alarm, crying at school AGAIN ... that's all. *deep inhale* Right, here we go. Monday started out as a pretty horrible day for me. I was supposed to meet with a friend but circumstances did not a...

... the person in question is your web design teacher, who is being an A and doesn't accept any proof that you did your freakin' homework PROPERLY, and her chosen uploading platform is stupid and uncommon of use for her students. I'm not bad with computers. I know how they work. I know my html is working. I just can't explain why it doesn't show up on that link. But I can promise every single web page I made and meticulously wrote the html for works PROPERLY on my end. Fudge your stupid FileZilla upload station, Ms. B. Hey, let's play a fun game and count how many times I yell the word "properly" in this post. Current count: 2 Now, let me explain to you guys as best I can what is happening so you can be mad at her with me. *stretches out interlaced fingers and cracks knuckles* I am registered in a web design course this fall. We cover html and css. (For now, we haven't gotten into CSS. Still in html.) The goal of the course is to learn ho...

Today, 7 October marks one week since my surprise birthday party. My sister and two good friends had planned a surprise for me for September 30. My birthday actually fell on the day after, but since that day would be a Monday and not everyone would be able to meet up at the same time, they decided to meet up the day before on Sunday. I absolutely loved the surprise and was genuinely surprised. But let me start from the beginning. I know I had asked my friends to have my party the Sunday before my birthday so that when the day came, I could post a nice photo to Instagram. So that's the expectation I had up until September 29. I was in my room with my sister, where we were sitting on our beds using our phones. She suddenly asked me, was it okay if I just went out with her tomorrow, since our two friends A and H suddenly had plans and couldn't make it. I was like, okay, sure. She said we could have my real party next week, and that was fine with me. So when Sunday came, I lo...

I think it's about time I return to reassure you that I am in fact still here, planning to keep up this blog, and I am not virtually dead. Abandoning this blog (by accident, mind you) has not been beneficial for me, especially as a writer. In all art classes, or classes where the goal of the course is to create things, teachers always tell you to practice what you do every day. If you're a photographer, shoot photos every day. If you draw, draw everyday. If you write, write every day. And et cetera. Keep up the practice and hone that skill. It doesn't matter how much of the thing you do every day, as long as you do it. In doing so, you're training your mind and body to familiarize with your actions, and turn them into habits and hobbies. You are training yourself to be thirsty for such activities. In the long break I took from actively writing, be it blog posts or novels, my thirst for creativity weakened. The mere thought of sitting down to write a story, for lack of...

I mean, do I ever write self-hate posts? Also, hi, I think this is my first blog post of 2018. Y'all probably unsubscribed or thought this blog was done for. I thought so too, but here I am. Only because I can't decide on which book of mine to write. I'm not in the mood for any of them. But I wanted to write something, and my blog is always the best place to go when I don't know what to write. Anyway, I really need an actual social life. Being social isn't all about receiving a ton of messages and DMs everyday, or having hundreds of followers on all the platforms, or reaching a certain number of likes on a post. Being social is using your communication skills and abilities to physically interact with people. The term 'social' has been altered over the years as technology came into and thrived in our current lives. It was pretty cool at first, let's not lie, but that didn't mean it would make a positive effect on our lives. I mean, cool, we could ha...